My mom recommended that I listen to Air America on 960 AM The Quake. I don't like talk radio - never have. Radio = music. Maybe enough to news to keep me informed of the important stuff, like duck and cover. But all that yakking on talk radio just drives me nuts. Manny has that on his clock radio in the morning and these guys incorporate themselves into my dreams until nothing makes sense and then I wake up to the same scenario and I get confused. Nonetheless I tuned in while I was driving to appease my mom and see what was what. Well, I have to say that it is kind of relaxing to realize that my friends and I are not the only rational people out there. Al Franken has a show, as does Janeane Garofalo., Robert Kennedy, Jr., and Steve Earle (The Revolution Starts Now). Since I only listen here and there during drive times I don't hear all the shows or all the hosts, but I dig it.
AIR EROTICA


dang this is dinky

The guys upstairs have been married for a year - is it really a year already?? Yeesh. There has been some bickering. Full-volume, dish-throwing bickering. Mostly the one screaming at the other (for example, the other went to tell the one that he should come to bed so he could be sure to get up on time. This somehow initiated a full-blown fest, which woke me up, it being 2 a.m. My reaction was to lie in bed seething and wishing I had the nerve to storm upstairs and club the one with an iron skillet. What prompted the tantrum is a mystery to both the other and me, and the other is getting tired of being picked on). Anyway, life has been a bit grim, since I never quite know when it is safe to go upstairs and play with my sewing machine, or even say hello. Plus, the one is failing to respond to the landlady about a tree that needs to come down, because he hates her (meaning is scared of her) and I'm scared she'll take action against us. Not looking forward to living in my car, which is what would happen if I got thrown out. I hope eventually we find out what the one is so mad about.
LINGERIE SEX FIGHTS

When I was a kid, if you didn't wear green on St. Patrick's day, you got pinched. The rude boys would pinch haaaarrrrddd. I would be scouring my outfit to find a speck of green in a little leaf or anywhere. Some years I would fail to produce my green armor and get bruises all over my arms. I'd try to affix a leaf or clump of grass to myself to avoid the torture. Horrible. Of course I would retaliate on the years I did wear green, and pinch the daylights out of anyone I could. Nowadays, anytime I have tried to pinch somebody I've gotten threatened with a lawsuit.

F**KED IN IRELAND (keepin' it clean)
(until you look at the picture)

I just read a really fun book called "Candyfreak" by Steve Almond. It is a true book, and a rant in the absolute best sense. The guy is consumed by his devotion to candy, and he goes all over to visit little candy companies. He couldn't visit the big ones, because all the Willy Wonka espionage stuff is true; even the repairmen have to be blindfolded until they are placed in front of the machines.

If you have any sort of candy jones (or "freak"), or any fond childhood memories of some kind of candy you forgot about, or quest for, or reminisce about, pick it up. I got it out of the library the same day I watched "Supersize Me" and "Fat Actress"; kind of a media food day. Of course, you can't read this book without actually having to eat some candy, so beware.

He covers such regional rarities as the Idaho Spud (which sounds downright revoltin') and the famous GooGoo Cluster, as well as the elusive and messy Valomilk. He is an ectomorph, which means that although he eats major amounts of candy, he stays thin, which means I hate him.

Today, at the recommendation of Mr. Almond, I picked up a few bars made by the Lake Champlain company. They are about the only candy he writes about that I can easily get my hands on. Well, kind of easily, if shopping for anything at Whole Paycheck (a.k.a. Whole Foods) is easy, especially in Me Valley (a.k.a. Mill Valley). They have several varieties of big flat chocolate bars, and these fat squatty bars called Five Star that come in 4 flavors, of which I found 2. Steve's recommendation was most astute, as these chocolates are pretty great. Check 'em out.

A TASTE OF CANDY

I am going to step on the Linkey-Loo coordinator's toes a bit, because I have a link instead of a title. It is, however, very much related to my position here as porn robot. Don't be scared, but you will have the dubious pleasure of viewing some pretty nasty, although non-human, sexual objects. When I worked at Gamelink (the porn place that started all this), the customers always asked what these looked like. I'm kinda glad I didn't have this to show them, because our inventory would have rotted. There are a couple I almost want to have as art objects. Almost.