Thank Heaven for the Olympics. They are my current drug of choice. Loving every minute of it no matter who wins (with the possible exception of that imperious ass Bob Costas). I even like bitchy old Dick Button, trying to keep skating from turning into a sloppy inelegant mess. Johhny Weir is my new skating idol, a smart, attitude-ridden, faggy punk who brings beauty back to the boys. Fast Track Skating is my new favorite sport, with or without Apolo; I love the build-up of speed, the stolen leads, the treacherous turns, pivoting off their fingertips (I also find skeleton mighty thrilling but I haven't seen any yet). I know some people pooh-pooh the whole Olympics thing, but I have been an addict since Jean-Claude Killy stole my heart when I was twelve.

Okay, the surgeons who worked on these women need to have their licenses yanked, if they ever even had one.
MEGA-BOOB OLYMPICS